Let me start off with saying that in my entire freshman year, I’ve never had to go to the library for anything. My research paper was solely dependent on online sources-it still kind of amazes me how I was able to pull that off; being it college and all.
Anyway, this year has become a complete 180 for me. I’ve been in the library for three days in a row now—prancing around like a mad person while eager to find those seemingly elusive books.
Each day was a different experience, (possibly progressive haha) which I’ve now assembled to form a generalized theory, which I’d like to call, the library effect.
1. State of Agitation/Brutal Acquaintance- you’re flustered and overwhelmed; you don’t know what you’re looking for, or whatever it is you need has been checked out. You’re silently cursing in your head, speaking all kinds of profanity in secret—addressed to that person that has borrowed the book before you. It’s every kind of frustration and confusion, rolled into one. Bottomline, you’re lost. Endless rows of books of every kind, massive choices. Yet really, you don’t know what’s necessary yet.
2. State of Lucidity- After borrowing some books and realizing they’re not what you need, you come into the library on a mission. You know what you have to look for—but more importantly, you know where to find it. No need for aimlessly searching through alleys and alleys reeking of old book smell; you’ve now found your personal niche—wherein relief and comfort resides. You then realize that it may be not that bad at all.
3. State of Conviction- Ahh, this is where you truly get comfortable. No need to keep going back to that computer to search; because really, you know the exact spot of that desired book. There is confidence and certainty, and you come in with less anxiety; you are more collected and unperturbed. Because this is the process of filtering and finalizing—you’re just trying to get the best possible sources, because ultimately you are sure of what you need and want. No more second thoughts here, no apprehensions, no hesitations. You come and you go, and you get out feeling content.
Well, this is at least what I’ve gone through. As fulfilling as it is to be able to pilot myself around the library, it always leaves you feeling so DRAINED. You get out being pissed off and feeling an inexplicable strain. Those three, as progressive as it seems, will always culminate to create the library effect.
The only consolation I get is the self-checkout. It is awesome, I tell you. Awesome! It makes me feel that tinge of happiness that the library is extracting from me.
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I was suppose to tumble about this, but I guess this pretty much sums up everything I wanted to say.
Oh and this..
AAAAAAGHHHHHHH!!!!
There.
